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untitled

thought of while listening to 'Men I Trust - Always Lone'

today was not like everyday
you weren't bothering me yet again
one of your photos crossed my sight
it made me wonder how are you doing without me
ashamed that it could be narcissism
tried sending signs that i want you
wonder if you felt these same tears all the times i didn't choose you
made me finish thoughts I never bothered when near you
why is it that this other subtle me
the one that lies beneath the drapes of my thoughts
has control over my emotions
when I do and do not love you
makes me miss, after shunning you
makes me annoyed when you're by my side
thats the only thing I haven't been able to admit
this shame of not knowing if I should or not feel guilty
for all the pain I did or not cause
make me yours
sane and happy
take it all out of me
take me home
because i do not know love
i do not know how